Posts
Hey Everyone,
Thanks to all who follow my blog and read it! I have recently upgraded and created my own website where I will now be hosting my blog from. Go check that out at www.kyleandrewzimmerman.com.
Kyle
what is my call?
Sometimes I wonder what I am truly called to in life. Am I called to be a leader in the church, am I called to be a great brother, am I called to be a friend to all? When I think of calling I think that this is the most important thing in my life. If God has called me to something then it is super important!
I think I am called to love God with all my heart, soul and mind. This is a simple realization that by living 100% for God I am going to be a good church leader, brother, friend and anything else I feel called to. But to truly live sold out for God, and let that love and relationship have an overflowing nature into the other aspects of my life is, in a way, revolutionary.
So often we are taught to excel at school, relationships, tasks, our job and I feel we miss out on the real purpose for our life. I want to love God and let that be my first priority in life. Everything else will follow!
So in considering my future and what to do after college this really impacts the way I consider my options. I feel like for grad school a Biblical Degree is in order. If I am going to spend the money to get a degree I want it to impact my relationship with God in the deepest way possible!
I also feel God calling me (a secondary calling) to be very theological in my ministry someday. That I am to really figure out theology and it's application to children as they develop. I want to hit kids with as deep of theology as possible for their age group starting as soon as they are born. Having a worldview from birth that God created them is a very powerful thing! Oh man, I'm excited to challenge kids to fall in love with God at a young age!!!
I think I am called to love God with all my heart, soul and mind. This is a simple realization that by living 100% for God I am going to be a good church leader, brother, friend and anything else I feel called to. But to truly live sold out for God, and let that love and relationship have an overflowing nature into the other aspects of my life is, in a way, revolutionary.
So often we are taught to excel at school, relationships, tasks, our job and I feel we miss out on the real purpose for our life. I want to love God and let that be my first priority in life. Everything else will follow!
So in considering my future and what to do after college this really impacts the way I consider my options. I feel like for grad school a Biblical Degree is in order. If I am going to spend the money to get a degree I want it to impact my relationship with God in the deepest way possible!
I also feel God calling me (a secondary calling) to be very theological in my ministry someday. That I am to really figure out theology and it's application to children as they develop. I want to hit kids with as deep of theology as possible for their age group starting as soon as they are born. Having a worldview from birth that God created them is a very powerful thing! Oh man, I'm excited to challenge kids to fall in love with God at a young age!!!
answered prayer
I have a hard time waking up in the morning. While I would classify myself as a morning person, I would also classify myself as sleep deprived and always looking for those few extra minutes.
Last night, when I was going to bed at 1am, I felt this huge desire for reading God's word and spending time with him and a sadness that I hadn't been able to read my Bible that day. I prayed a simple prayer, "Lord help me to wake up and spend time with you in the morning". I then went to bed with my alarm set for 7:15. When my alarm went off this morning I was less than enthusiastic and I hit the snooze. But once my alarm went off again I remembered my prayer and I got out of bed with an attitude that it was time to Worship God! I praise him so much for this answered prayer, that he would help me wake up and above all remind me of my last thought and desire of before I went to bed just as I am waking up so that I can follow through this morning. God is so good.
9 ”So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. (Luke 11:9-10)
When we are seeking after God the desires of our heart will be that of his, and when we ask for those things, we will receive them. This is a simple example of how I can claim the promise in this verse today!
Last night, when I was going to bed at 1am, I felt this huge desire for reading God's word and spending time with him and a sadness that I hadn't been able to read my Bible that day. I prayed a simple prayer, "Lord help me to wake up and spend time with you in the morning". I then went to bed with my alarm set for 7:15. When my alarm went off this morning I was less than enthusiastic and I hit the snooze. But once my alarm went off again I remembered my prayer and I got out of bed with an attitude that it was time to Worship God! I praise him so much for this answered prayer, that he would help me wake up and above all remind me of my last thought and desire of before I went to bed just as I am waking up so that I can follow through this morning. God is so good.
9 ”So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. (Luke 11:9-10)
When we are seeking after God the desires of our heart will be that of his, and when we ask for those things, we will receive them. This is a simple example of how I can claim the promise in this verse today!
releasing the future
It may be odd to think about releasing the future since no one can predict it. However, I believe many of us if not all of us try to control it and direct our steps today so that we will arrive where we want to be in the future. I am very much guilty of doing this in my life, trying to make sure I don't get off the path I've created for my life.
Well God is revealing to me that this is, simply put, sin. I don't want sin in my life, but giving up control of my life to him is not easy, and I really don't know how to do it. I believe I will continue to give up pieces of control to Him for the rest of my life.
As far as my future is concerned, I am anxious about it. All of the uncertainties and unknowns that will follow this constant known as college. Upon graduation where do I go, what do I do, who do I hang out with? All of these thoughts run through my head.
Well I feel very strongly that God has called me to ministry in the local church and that my path is heading to that destination. However, that's about as much control as I have given God. I still want to control where I go, who I work for, what ministry I get to do, and who I can impact.
Wow, that sounds super selfish and stuck up when I see it written down.
But I don't feel selfish. If you ask me about my future I will tell you (and have been telling others) that it's completely in God's hands and that he will place me in the right church. However I have always in my mind been truly saying, "God will put me in the perfect church for me and I won't have to deal with problems because that ministry and my personality will be a perfect match." Now that is selfish.
This weekend I went back home to Victorville and talked with my family and pastors from my home church. I was very encouraged to talk about my passions, future, ministry desires and church's in general. This may not seem like a big deal but what happened in my heart this weekend was a big deal.
I released my home church to God as a place I would be willing to work in the future. Since feeling God's call to ministry I have always had the unspoken (and possibly spoken at times) understanding that I would never move back home and do ministry in the church I grew up in. What I really was saying was, I don't trust you God and I think that the best church for me is not this church.
By releasing this church to the Lord I feel like I am closer to being able to say, "Lord send me" and truly mean I am willing to go wherever. I don't know if that will happen soon, where I am able to release my whole future to Him, but I am praying and working toward that end.
And to clarify for anyone close to me that may be reading into this, I am not saying I want to work at the church I grew up at. I am just ecstatic that my heart is now much closer to being ok with working where God wants me to work.
I am now saying "Lord, please place me in the perfect ministry for your kingdom, not for my personal comfort." Please pray for me that this will be true in both my heart and in my future and that I continue to release my future to Him since he already knows it!
Well God is revealing to me that this is, simply put, sin. I don't want sin in my life, but giving up control of my life to him is not easy, and I really don't know how to do it. I believe I will continue to give up pieces of control to Him for the rest of my life.
As far as my future is concerned, I am anxious about it. All of the uncertainties and unknowns that will follow this constant known as college. Upon graduation where do I go, what do I do, who do I hang out with? All of these thoughts run through my head.
Well I feel very strongly that God has called me to ministry in the local church and that my path is heading to that destination. However, that's about as much control as I have given God. I still want to control where I go, who I work for, what ministry I get to do, and who I can impact.
Wow, that sounds super selfish and stuck up when I see it written down.
But I don't feel selfish. If you ask me about my future I will tell you (and have been telling others) that it's completely in God's hands and that he will place me in the right church. However I have always in my mind been truly saying, "God will put me in the perfect church for me and I won't have to deal with problems because that ministry and my personality will be a perfect match." Now that is selfish.
This weekend I went back home to Victorville and talked with my family and pastors from my home church. I was very encouraged to talk about my passions, future, ministry desires and church's in general. This may not seem like a big deal but what happened in my heart this weekend was a big deal.
I released my home church to God as a place I would be willing to work in the future. Since feeling God's call to ministry I have always had the unspoken (and possibly spoken at times) understanding that I would never move back home and do ministry in the church I grew up in. What I really was saying was, I don't trust you God and I think that the best church for me is not this church.
By releasing this church to the Lord I feel like I am closer to being able to say, "Lord send me" and truly mean I am willing to go wherever. I don't know if that will happen soon, where I am able to release my whole future to Him, but I am praying and working toward that end.
And to clarify for anyone close to me that may be reading into this, I am not saying I want to work at the church I grew up at. I am just ecstatic that my heart is now much closer to being ok with working where God wants me to work.
I am now saying "Lord, please place me in the perfect ministry for your kingdom, not for my personal comfort." Please pray for me that this will be true in both my heart and in my future and that I continue to release my future to Him since he already knows it!
i have a feeling...
...that God is going to use me in ways that I can't imagine right now. In class today we were talking about biblical leadership and at the end of class the professor asked if we were willing to step up and be this kind of leader, a servant who sacrificed for others. He then asked us to try envisioning where we would be five years from now in ministry.
First off, I want to be a servant leader! That is a goal of mine and something I want to strive for.
Secondly, I was thinking about my future in ministry and all I saw myself doing was being involved in life change. The next thought I had about my future in ministry was that of missions work.
Could mission work be for me? I have a feeling that it could be. Being able to be relational, teach, think outside of the box, work with families and having to be entirely dependent on Christ...what could be better than that?!?!
It's something to think about..."gonna be a good night"!
First off, I want to be a servant leader! That is a goal of mine and something I want to strive for.
Secondly, I was thinking about my future in ministry and all I saw myself doing was being involved in life change. The next thought I had about my future in ministry was that of missions work.
Could mission work be for me? I have a feeling that it could be. Being able to be relational, teach, think outside of the box, work with families and having to be entirely dependent on Christ...what could be better than that?!?!
It's something to think about..."gonna be a good night"!
a little this and that...
Wow, I just had an amazing conversation tonight with a good friend. I am a very relational person and really get fueled up by conversations such as this, and through this have thought about things with a slightly different lens.
One such thing is girls. We talked about relationships and girls in each others lives (or lack there of/prospects) and what we valued. I walked away with the idea that waiting is good and that this girl has got to be pretty phenomenal! We also talked about love and how the day you say "I do" is when your relationship is set in stone and that the commitment of love, not the feeling of love is the foundation.
Is life really all that complicated? I would say yes, there is so much to think about and process through and decisions to make. All of this then needs to be filtered through a number of different lens' both biblical and culturally (or at least it would seem) before a final decision can be made. However what if we lived in black and white? What if you approached life with a very small consistent playbook? You always approached life with the utmost integrity, love for people, humility, wisdom and dependence on God especially through prayer? It seems like this would take a lot of the complications out of life.
One other thing that this guy said was great. He said (which he got from somewhere else), "live life as if you could lose your salvation while knowing that you are secure in Christ". Now I don't know if this completely encompasses the Christian life, in fact I know it doesn't, but it sure gives me perspective on a godly fear. I all to often think and approach God as a mentor, friend, coach or guide. I don't approach him as my GOD. I don't have a commitment to my God that would overshadow anything else that could ever happen in life to me. I think this is so because I don't necessarily see him as my God. I want to, and it is my prayer, reoriente my view of God as I AM.
Well I need to write a paper for class, but this is healthy for me to journal and process and be transparent (with whomever may read this...) and I love it. I wish I blogged/journaled more often but time doesn't necessarily allow for it. I'll leave with this prayer:
God, make me see you as God. In some way this week knock me to my knees and make me realize just how just, powerful, loving and everything else you are. Father help me to be a man who lives humbly and loves deeply and cares for those that need to be cared for. I want to grow, help me to do so. Amen.
One such thing is girls. We talked about relationships and girls in each others lives (or lack there of/prospects) and what we valued. I walked away with the idea that waiting is good and that this girl has got to be pretty phenomenal! We also talked about love and how the day you say "I do" is when your relationship is set in stone and that the commitment of love, not the feeling of love is the foundation.
Is life really all that complicated? I would say yes, there is so much to think about and process through and decisions to make. All of this then needs to be filtered through a number of different lens' both biblical and culturally (or at least it would seem) before a final decision can be made. However what if we lived in black and white? What if you approached life with a very small consistent playbook? You always approached life with the utmost integrity, love for people, humility, wisdom and dependence on God especially through prayer? It seems like this would take a lot of the complications out of life.
One other thing that this guy said was great. He said (which he got from somewhere else), "live life as if you could lose your salvation while knowing that you are secure in Christ". Now I don't know if this completely encompasses the Christian life, in fact I know it doesn't, but it sure gives me perspective on a godly fear. I all to often think and approach God as a mentor, friend, coach or guide. I don't approach him as my GOD. I don't have a commitment to my God that would overshadow anything else that could ever happen in life to me. I think this is so because I don't necessarily see him as my God. I want to, and it is my prayer, reoriente my view of God as I AM.
Well I need to write a paper for class, but this is healthy for me to journal and process and be transparent (with whomever may read this...) and I love it. I wish I blogged/journaled more often but time doesn't necessarily allow for it. I'll leave with this prayer:
God, make me see you as God. In some way this week knock me to my knees and make me realize just how just, powerful, loving and everything else you are. Father help me to be a man who lives humbly and loves deeply and cares for those that need to be cared for. I want to grow, help me to do so. Amen.
an update on life
I officially started my Senior Year (and last year) of college at Biola University 2 weeks ago. So far it has have been going great and I am loving everything about it…besides all the work that is. Both semesters of mine are going to be super busy since I will be taking extra full course loads to graduate on time and working 20 hours a week at my church. It’ going to be awesome!
As far as my internship goes I just hit my 1 year mark working at Friends Church in Yorba Linda, CA. For those of you that don’t know I work in the Children’s Department there with kids from 0 years old up through 6th grade. It’s been quite an exciting year and I truly believe that the Lord is using this church to prepare me for ministry. In the last year I have been to Summer Camp, Winter Camp, worked on VBS, helped lead a mid-week program for 5th and 6th graders, worked on the weekends leading small groups, teaching large group, and learning the ropes as well as many more amazing opportunities to grow in my leadership and programming abilities. It’s been quite challenging, but a huge year of growth for me!
Something that’s been very exciting for me this year is getting an apartment with 3 other guys. It’s pretty awesome and I’m really enjoying the whole process of the place. I mean I really don’t mind the cleaning and chores and cooking and stuff. It’s quite fun actually! Having a place that I can call mine is super nice after I’ve moved 7 other times since starting college.
What I’m excited for this year: Graduation! That’s a big one since it’s the end of my basic education! I can see freedom (or at least it looks that way to me) at the end of this road and I can’t wait to not have classes! I’m also looking forward to developing some great friendships with Biola people and Church people this year! I’m a people person and love to connect with others and what God is doing in their life.
How God is working in my life: God is really working on my heart right now. I have a lot of head knowledge and a lot of times know the right thing to do. However I don’t always feel it or want what is right and best. I believe God is really working on my heart to line up what I know to be true with how I will feel in those situations. I’m really excited to see how my heart and mind can someday work as a cohesive team to help me make the wise choices in life!
If you want to get a hold of me to ask more questions or check in to see how I’m doing you can do that these ways:
E-Mail: kyle.a.zimmerman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/kylezimmerman
Twitter: www.twitter.com/kyle_zimmerman
As far as my internship goes I just hit my 1 year mark working at Friends Church in Yorba Linda, CA. For those of you that don’t know I work in the Children’s Department there with kids from 0 years old up through 6th grade. It’s been quite an exciting year and I truly believe that the Lord is using this church to prepare me for ministry. In the last year I have been to Summer Camp, Winter Camp, worked on VBS, helped lead a mid-week program for 5th and 6th graders, worked on the weekends leading small groups, teaching large group, and learning the ropes as well as many more amazing opportunities to grow in my leadership and programming abilities. It’s been quite challenging, but a huge year of growth for me!
Something that’s been very exciting for me this year is getting an apartment with 3 other guys. It’s pretty awesome and I’m really enjoying the whole process of the place. I mean I really don’t mind the cleaning and chores and cooking and stuff. It’s quite fun actually! Having a place that I can call mine is super nice after I’ve moved 7 other times since starting college.
What I’m excited for this year: Graduation! That’s a big one since it’s the end of my basic education! I can see freedom (or at least it looks that way to me) at the end of this road and I can’t wait to not have classes! I’m also looking forward to developing some great friendships with Biola people and Church people this year! I’m a people person and love to connect with others and what God is doing in their life.
How God is working in my life: God is really working on my heart right now. I have a lot of head knowledge and a lot of times know the right thing to do. However I don’t always feel it or want what is right and best. I believe God is really working on my heart to line up what I know to be true with how I will feel in those situations. I’m really excited to see how my heart and mind can someday work as a cohesive team to help me make the wise choices in life!
If you want to get a hold of me to ask more questions or check in to see how I’m doing you can do that these ways:
E-Mail: kyle.a.zimmerman@gmail.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/kylezimmerman
Twitter: www.twitter.com/kyle_zimmerman
the fourth
I can't get over how awesome of a weekend I just had! Seriously, it was a gift from God to be able to get away from the business of life and rest with friends for the 4th of July. I had a couple thoughts and wanted to share them with hopefully someone:
I went up to Ojai (near Ventura, CA and not short for Ohio) for the weekend with friends from school. First off, it was huge to get out of Yorba Linda and breathe a bit. I had been feeling trapped in a routine and so getting away=very good. Second, I chose not to take my watch up with me and left my phone off for a good chunk of the weekend. It was so nice to feel detached from reality.
I don't really think the weekend was so awesome because of what we did (which was lots of fun) but because of spending quality time with close friends. These are (some of) the people who I've grown to respect and love over the last three years of school. It was fun to talk with them, see how far we have come, dream of the future and even get to know each other better.
I found God in some unique ways through this time:
1) Rest is key. I was able to experience and hear God better when I wasn't stressed and busy.
2) The future is His. I can't know or plan for my future, but I can let him control my life and it will be great!
3) I'm a relational being, just like my heavenly father. I must pour into relationship with God just like I need to pour into my relationships with friends. I felt rejuvenated by spending time with friends, how much more by spending quality time with my creator?!
There's so much more, but I'm not the best communicator so I'll leave it at that and continue to smile on the inside at the rest.
I went up to Ojai (near Ventura, CA and not short for Ohio) for the weekend with friends from school. First off, it was huge to get out of Yorba Linda and breathe a bit. I had been feeling trapped in a routine and so getting away=very good. Second, I chose not to take my watch up with me and left my phone off for a good chunk of the weekend. It was so nice to feel detached from reality.
I don't really think the weekend was so awesome because of what we did (which was lots of fun) but because of spending quality time with close friends. These are (some of) the people who I've grown to respect and love over the last three years of school. It was fun to talk with them, see how far we have come, dream of the future and even get to know each other better.
I found God in some unique ways through this time:
1) Rest is key. I was able to experience and hear God better when I wasn't stressed and busy.
2) The future is His. I can't know or plan for my future, but I can let him control my life and it will be great!
3) I'm a relational being, just like my heavenly father. I must pour into relationship with God just like I need to pour into my relationships with friends. I felt rejuvenated by spending time with friends, how much more by spending quality time with my creator?!
There's so much more, but I'm not the best communicator so I'll leave it at that and continue to smile on the inside at the rest.
rest
Not something I tend to like to do. I’m the guy that pushes and pushes and pushes…and then crashes. I have a constant need to be doing something, working towards a goal, accomplishing something, and this need gets in the way of rest. I was thinking about this last night and I wondered why this is. Why do I neglect sleep, self-maintenance, and my personal needs in order to keep on doing and accomplishing?
I think part of the reason is because I don’t ever think what I do is good enough, and maybe if I do more it will be. I have a constant list of goals in my mind at all times; goals for me personally and goals for my work and education. Don’t ask me what they are because I can’t actually tell you, they are just there…in the subconscious.
But I can only sustain a fast paced, no rest life for so long. In my life I have noticed a pattern…a pattern of great hi’s and not so great low’s. A low always follows directly after a hi. I wonder (comment if you have thoughts) if I was to do a little less and not push quite as hard, would I be able to sustain longer and more consistently a life of hard work and devotion to my heavenly father? It seems reasonable to me to think yes, now the hard part for me is to try and not push so hard.
My first step in not pushing so hard began yesterday. After 8 hours of work and a school meeting I decided to just stop everything. Rather than hanging out with friends, working more, or thinking about my future I went to the driving range and watched a movie by myself at home. So nice! And I’m ready to work and pour into it today. Let’s see if it works out.
I think part of the reason is because I don’t ever think what I do is good enough, and maybe if I do more it will be. I have a constant list of goals in my mind at all times; goals for me personally and goals for my work and education. Don’t ask me what they are because I can’t actually tell you, they are just there…in the subconscious.
But I can only sustain a fast paced, no rest life for so long. In my life I have noticed a pattern…a pattern of great hi’s and not so great low’s. A low always follows directly after a hi. I wonder (comment if you have thoughts) if I was to do a little less and not push quite as hard, would I be able to sustain longer and more consistently a life of hard work and devotion to my heavenly father? It seems reasonable to me to think yes, now the hard part for me is to try and not push so hard.
My first step in not pushing so hard began yesterday. After 8 hours of work and a school meeting I decided to just stop everything. Rather than hanging out with friends, working more, or thinking about my future I went to the driving range and watched a movie by myself at home. So nice! And I’m ready to work and pour into it today. Let’s see if it works out.
who do i want to be...
I am currently sitting in Starbucks reading the book of Hosea. I have read through this book before, and it is one of my favorites. It’s all about how Israel is unfaithful to God...how I am unfaithful to God. Whenever I read this book I begin to reflect on who I am, what I want to be, and how I want to get there.
WHO AM I? I am a Christ Follower, or at least I try to be. I fail way to often but am beginning to let God’s grace live through me. I am the whore that is mentioned in Hosea 1:2, as I walk away from God far to often, but put on the show of love and affection when others are looking. I absolutely hate that about myself, how I can love God so much one minute and deliberately do something I know he doesn’t love the next minute. I am continually working on how I can be a better Christ Follower, how I can authentically live out the love I know I have for God.
WHO I WANT TO BE: I want to be the same person on the inside (how I see myself) and on the outside (how others see me). This is my deepest desire, to not be a hypocrite. I also want to be someone who knows the Word of God. I want to know the heart of my creator and be able to accurately share that person with the world at any moment in time. I want to be an authentic Christ follower. I also want to be an awesome husband and father someday. I have a huge passion for family and family ministry, and I want to first live that out in my own family whenever that comes around in my life. I want to be a spiritual leader in my home, in the church, and in my oikos (relational world).
HOW I WANT TO GET THERE: Well I don’t really know. I’m 21...but I know the path starts now / already has started. A passion of mine for a long time now has been to do a master’s degree with a strong biblical emphasis. I have been looking at that for a while. That passion somewhat dies down when I’m in the middle of a semester and thoroughly engulfed in the overwhelming amounts of work I have. But it is an underlying passion, because although I have no need to go to school to learn the Bible, I feel like I will learn in much better through an institution/program. As for now I want to commit to being in a personal Bible study all of the time. Whether that is through a curriculum or just me exploring and studying and reading for myself I don’t know yet, but I need to be in the word constantly.
So as I sit here, only on Hosea 2 because I got distracted with these thoughts, my eyes turn back to Gomer. I don’t want to be a Gomer, I want to be a Hosea. Gomer betrays the unconditional love of Hosea time and time again. It breaks Hosea’s heart. I want my heart to break like God’s does, I want to be faithful to what God is calling me to, and I want to one day hear the Lord say “well done” when I see him in Glory.
WHO AM I? I am a Christ Follower, or at least I try to be. I fail way to often but am beginning to let God’s grace live through me. I am the whore that is mentioned in Hosea 1:2, as I walk away from God far to often, but put on the show of love and affection when others are looking. I absolutely hate that about myself, how I can love God so much one minute and deliberately do something I know he doesn’t love the next minute. I am continually working on how I can be a better Christ Follower, how I can authentically live out the love I know I have for God.
WHO I WANT TO BE: I want to be the same person on the inside (how I see myself) and on the outside (how others see me). This is my deepest desire, to not be a hypocrite. I also want to be someone who knows the Word of God. I want to know the heart of my creator and be able to accurately share that person with the world at any moment in time. I want to be an authentic Christ follower. I also want to be an awesome husband and father someday. I have a huge passion for family and family ministry, and I want to first live that out in my own family whenever that comes around in my life. I want to be a spiritual leader in my home, in the church, and in my oikos (relational world).
HOW I WANT TO GET THERE: Well I don’t really know. I’m 21...but I know the path starts now / already has started. A passion of mine for a long time now has been to do a master’s degree with a strong biblical emphasis. I have been looking at that for a while. That passion somewhat dies down when I’m in the middle of a semester and thoroughly engulfed in the overwhelming amounts of work I have. But it is an underlying passion, because although I have no need to go to school to learn the Bible, I feel like I will learn in much better through an institution/program. As for now I want to commit to being in a personal Bible study all of the time. Whether that is through a curriculum or just me exploring and studying and reading for myself I don’t know yet, but I need to be in the word constantly.
So as I sit here, only on Hosea 2 because I got distracted with these thoughts, my eyes turn back to Gomer. I don’t want to be a Gomer, I want to be a Hosea. Gomer betrays the unconditional love of Hosea time and time again. It breaks Hosea’s heart. I want my heart to break like God’s does, I want to be faithful to what God is calling me to, and I want to one day hear the Lord say “well done” when I see him in Glory.
sitting on a plane...
It’s Spring Break for me this week and I’m taking it off! It’s time for a little vacation with the family, to reconnect and rejuvenate. It’s been a long semester and it will be great to have a week without school and work. Although I wish I were back home hanging out with friends all week, it will be great to see family. Which is why I’m on a plane…flying to Oregon to visit my Grandpa and Dad’s family. It’s gonna be awesome!
However as I sit here on the plane I’m trying to think of what to do. I brought some movies…I’m sitting with my mom (who’s doing a Bible Study) and I’m just not sure. I’m so used to always being connected to people, but on a plane I can’t use the internet or my phone. I’m not sure what to do. Am I really that dependent on technology to talk with people? I look out my window and think about something and want to share it with someone who’s not with me…maybe even twitpic it☺. I don’t know, it’s a disease I guess, but I love being connected with the world.
I think I am going to take some time to read because I don’t do that very often and I really should. It will be good. By the way, I’m just writing this on a word document and will post it at some other time when I get internet access in Oregon…which I’m not sure how easily that will be either.
However as I sit here on the plane I’m trying to think of what to do. I brought some movies…I’m sitting with my mom (who’s doing a Bible Study) and I’m just not sure. I’m so used to always being connected to people, but on a plane I can’t use the internet or my phone. I’m not sure what to do. Am I really that dependent on technology to talk with people? I look out my window and think about something and want to share it with someone who’s not with me…maybe even twitpic it☺. I don’t know, it’s a disease I guess, but I love being connected with the world.
I think I am going to take some time to read because I don’t do that very often and I really should. It will be good. By the way, I’m just writing this on a word document and will post it at some other time when I get internet access in Oregon…which I’m not sure how easily that will be either.
integration
One of the course requirements at Biola University is to take an Integration Seminar class as an upper division Bible Elective. As a Christian Education Major I decided to go with the class topic of Christian Ministry. The class is well done, a lot of stuff goes over my head, but there are some gold nuggets that I pull out every once in a while.
Today was a good day in the class and I took away some great stuff. One of those things was how do people come to be a Christian? What makes someone want to choose being a Christian over living the "good life" in the world? How do I, as a Christian leader in the church present the Christian life with all of it's ups and downs as better than living in the world?
It came down to two things that really struck me between the eyes.
1) For a long time, the church has tried to present the Christian life as something far better, and in a way easier, than living in the world. We came to the realization that this isn't true. Being a Christian is hard, probably the hardest thing any of us could ever do. But it comes down to instant versus delayed gratification.
Living in the world allows for instant gratification through sex, drugs, alcohol, and other things that allow for a momentary high but not a lasting one. Many people live high to high because that is "the good life".
However, for a Christian it is all about delayed gratification. Matthew 10:39 says, "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." This means that as a Christian we must deny self and take on the attributes and lifestyle of Christ. In this way we will find deeper and more meaningful life. It is a hard thing to do because it means denying the instant gratification of the world in order to have greater fulfillment both on this earth and in eternity.
So to apply this to kids, students and adults it is important to capitalize on their desire to learn based on their life stage and create a desire for delayed gratification. If a deep desire for this can be attained, churched kids would not fall away from the faith because of the denial of self that is so prevalent in their lives.
2) The other conclusion from class is that soul work is the responsibility of the Holy Spirit. It is not for me to carry a burden to keep kids out of this or that, but for me to pray for their souls and the burdens that people face each day. Through prayer and faith the Lord's will is done and people are changed for eternity.
There is much work for me to do, I can not think it's all the Holy Spirit's job because it is his job to work in people's hearts through what we do in ministry. But with prayer the responsibility is lessened and our faith and love for the Lord is strengthened.
I hope this isn't too jumbled to understand...I'm still working through it myself. I just have a strong desire to see pain and suffering be a result to living for the Lord and not for the world.
Today was a good day in the class and I took away some great stuff. One of those things was how do people come to be a Christian? What makes someone want to choose being a Christian over living the "good life" in the world? How do I, as a Christian leader in the church present the Christian life with all of it's ups and downs as better than living in the world?
It came down to two things that really struck me between the eyes.
1) For a long time, the church has tried to present the Christian life as something far better, and in a way easier, than living in the world. We came to the realization that this isn't true. Being a Christian is hard, probably the hardest thing any of us could ever do. But it comes down to instant versus delayed gratification.
Living in the world allows for instant gratification through sex, drugs, alcohol, and other things that allow for a momentary high but not a lasting one. Many people live high to high because that is "the good life".
However, for a Christian it is all about delayed gratification. Matthew 10:39 says, "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." This means that as a Christian we must deny self and take on the attributes and lifestyle of Christ. In this way we will find deeper and more meaningful life. It is a hard thing to do because it means denying the instant gratification of the world in order to have greater fulfillment both on this earth and in eternity.
So to apply this to kids, students and adults it is important to capitalize on their desire to learn based on their life stage and create a desire for delayed gratification. If a deep desire for this can be attained, churched kids would not fall away from the faith because of the denial of self that is so prevalent in their lives.
2) The other conclusion from class is that soul work is the responsibility of the Holy Spirit. It is not for me to carry a burden to keep kids out of this or that, but for me to pray for their souls and the burdens that people face each day. Through prayer and faith the Lord's will is done and people are changed for eternity.
There is much work for me to do, I can not think it's all the Holy Spirit's job because it is his job to work in people's hearts through what we do in ministry. But with prayer the responsibility is lessened and our faith and love for the Lord is strengthened.
I hope this isn't too jumbled to understand...I'm still working through it myself. I just have a strong desire to see pain and suffering be a result to living for the Lord and not for the world.
life is good
So I haven't posted in about a week, so I thought I would update (to the zero reader base that I have...) that life is good! In the last week I was able to finish a research paper on time, get through classes and excel at them I believe, and to attend Biola's annual Mission Conference.
Missions Conference, MC, is completely student run and is all about mission work in the world. It was a very exciting time on campus and I'm sure many people made commitments to missions. For me however, I heard more than anything the call to release our lives to God and live missionaly. This means to me, to allow God to call me anywhere and believe and trust in him of the plan he has for my life.
So I'm doing that. God is taking me in new places, and new adventures are beginning. I can't wait to see where God takes me over the next weeks, months, years, and for the rest of my life. I'm on borrowed time, so I'm going to live for the lender: My King!
Missions Conference, MC, is completely student run and is all about mission work in the world. It was a very exciting time on campus and I'm sure many people made commitments to missions. For me however, I heard more than anything the call to release our lives to God and live missionaly. This means to me, to allow God to call me anywhere and believe and trust in him of the plan he has for my life.
So I'm doing that. God is taking me in new places, and new adventures are beginning. I can't wait to see where God takes me over the next weeks, months, years, and for the rest of my life. I'm on borrowed time, so I'm going to live for the lender: My King!
i can only imagine...
Every time I think of death I come to this song by Mercy Me. It all started my junior year of high school when my band director passed away very suddenly to cancer. At his funeral this song was played and since then I use it to reflect on life and death and heaven.
Why am I listening to it now? Well I just found out that a former professor, mentor, and friend of mine has brain cancer. Why? Why God would you allow him to get sick, especially like this? There is no hope to be seen except in a miracle. Please Lord, give him a miracle.
Why is there so much pain and suffering in the world? Why does God allow for people to suffer and die, especially people who have lived their whole life in service to you and desire nothing more than to raise up the next generation of Christian leaders.
And how could this be your plan, your will? I know it is, I don't doubt, but why? That's my real question...why would you let this happen? Why would you will it to happen? Why can't I see what you see, the bigger picture? Father God, I don't understand...
Isaiah 45:9 says: “Woe to him who strives with him who formed him, a pot among earthen pots! Does the clay say to him who forms it, ‘What are you making?’ or ‘Your work has no handles’?"
God I'm not questioning you because I know in my heart that you are in control. I do not doubt, but it still hurts. And on a surface level does not make sense at all. Please Lord, help me to see your will. Maybe it's for me, for me to be processing and thinking through this...but I sure hope not because no man's life is worth that lesson.
Father, I pray for a miracle. I ask you to save his life, to cure him from the cancer and do your work through his sickness and not through his death. Please father, spare his life and allow him to continue serving you. I love you and trust in you God. I trust in you. Amen.
Why am I listening to it now? Well I just found out that a former professor, mentor, and friend of mine has brain cancer. Why? Why God would you allow him to get sick, especially like this? There is no hope to be seen except in a miracle. Please Lord, give him a miracle.
Why is there so much pain and suffering in the world? Why does God allow for people to suffer and die, especially people who have lived their whole life in service to you and desire nothing more than to raise up the next generation of Christian leaders.
And how could this be your plan, your will? I know it is, I don't doubt, but why? That's my real question...why would you let this happen? Why would you will it to happen? Why can't I see what you see, the bigger picture? Father God, I don't understand...
Isaiah 45:9 says: “Woe to him who strives with him who formed him, a pot among earthen pots! Does the clay say to him who forms it, ‘What are you making?’ or ‘Your work has no handles’?"
God I'm not questioning you because I know in my heart that you are in control. I do not doubt, but it still hurts. And on a surface level does not make sense at all. Please Lord, help me to see your will. Maybe it's for me, for me to be processing and thinking through this...but I sure hope not because no man's life is worth that lesson.
Father, I pray for a miracle. I ask you to save his life, to cure him from the cancer and do your work through his sickness and not through his death. Please father, spare his life and allow him to continue serving you. I love you and trust in you God. I trust in you. Amen.
global freedom
Tonight I got the privileged to attend a special event at my church. It was called a spotlight dessert which is a fancy way of putting together a night to talk about giving to the capital campaign at my church. However, this is like no other capital campaign I have ever seen.
The campaign is called Global Freedom: Empowering Tomorrow's Generation Today. It's really an amazing vision and I am so excited to be apart of it. The idea is that our church is called to something great. We are going off of Acts 1:8 where Jesus says to the leaders of the early church at his ascension into heaven to go be his witness in Judea, Samaria and even to the ends of the Earth. For my church we are breaking up this campaign into 3 phases.
Judea: Our local church. Building projects on sight to increase our home church ministry.
Samaria: Our community. Partnering with existing ministries in impacting the people throughout our community.
The Ends of the World: Specifically for my church this is India. We believe that we have been called to eradicate the caste system there and free an entire people group, the Dalits.
This spotlight event however was very moving for me. It was a time to hear about the vision in a very media driven way. But it was very personal as well. Personal stories were shared about the vision and how financially supporting the campaign would impact lives for the Kingdom of God.
As a college student and an intern at the church I don't have that much money rolling around for me to put towards a capital campaign. But the beauty of this whole Global Freedom Movement is that I believe it to be necessary. Necessary to act, to be apart of, to sacrifice, and to trust.
Yesterday I was writing curriculum for some elementary age students on the story of Moses. It was about how he had to trust in God to help him lead the Israelites out of Egypt and towards the promised land. As I got to the end of the lesson and started hitting on some application points I asked the kids if they could trust God. I then started piecing together in my head, that just like Moses, my church is trying to free a people group.
I got some goosebumps then, but tonight at the spotlight dinner the story of Moses was brought up again. I feel like God is calling me to be apart of another story of Moses. I don't know what it's going to look like or how I can possibly be financially involved in this, but I am going to trust God to make it work.
God places opportunities in our life for a reason. Global Freedom is an opportunity for me to be apart of what God wants to do in the world, but more importantly it allows God to do something in my heart. God doesn't force his way into my heart, he allows me the opportunity to meet him and grow by experiencing his will.
Global Freedom is his will for my church and for me personally. I am getting on board with the expectation for great things, both in my life and in the world.
The campaign is called Global Freedom: Empowering Tomorrow's Generation Today. It's really an amazing vision and I am so excited to be apart of it. The idea is that our church is called to something great. We are going off of Acts 1:8 where Jesus says to the leaders of the early church at his ascension into heaven to go be his witness in Judea, Samaria and even to the ends of the Earth. For my church we are breaking up this campaign into 3 phases.
Judea: Our local church. Building projects on sight to increase our home church ministry.
Samaria: Our community. Partnering with existing ministries in impacting the people throughout our community.
The Ends of the World: Specifically for my church this is India. We believe that we have been called to eradicate the caste system there and free an entire people group, the Dalits.
This spotlight event however was very moving for me. It was a time to hear about the vision in a very media driven way. But it was very personal as well. Personal stories were shared about the vision and how financially supporting the campaign would impact lives for the Kingdom of God.
As a college student and an intern at the church I don't have that much money rolling around for me to put towards a capital campaign. But the beauty of this whole Global Freedom Movement is that I believe it to be necessary. Necessary to act, to be apart of, to sacrifice, and to trust.
Yesterday I was writing curriculum for some elementary age students on the story of Moses. It was about how he had to trust in God to help him lead the Israelites out of Egypt and towards the promised land. As I got to the end of the lesson and started hitting on some application points I asked the kids if they could trust God. I then started piecing together in my head, that just like Moses, my church is trying to free a people group.
I got some goosebumps then, but tonight at the spotlight dinner the story of Moses was brought up again. I feel like God is calling me to be apart of another story of Moses. I don't know what it's going to look like or how I can possibly be financially involved in this, but I am going to trust God to make it work.
God places opportunities in our life for a reason. Global Freedom is an opportunity for me to be apart of what God wants to do in the world, but more importantly it allows God to do something in my heart. God doesn't force his way into my heart, he allows me the opportunity to meet him and grow by experiencing his will.
Global Freedom is his will for my church and for me personally. I am getting on board with the expectation for great things, both in my life and in the world.
the beginning of this journey
Life is a journey. From the moment we are born to the moment we die we are all traveling on the road of life.
ὁδὸς is a Greek word that means road or journey. The word is pronounced hodos with the vowel "o" being pronounced long. ὁδὸς has become the definition of life to me.
As I begin this blog my desire is to share this journey (ὁδὸς) with you. I want to share with you what the Lord is teaching me and how I am growing into the person he desires for me to be. I'm not sure what this is going to look like yet, but it is bound to be interesting. As you read this blog you will learn more about who I am and hopefully more about how God is actively working in my life.
Will you join me on "myhodos"?
ὁδὸς is a Greek word that means road or journey. The word is pronounced hodos with the vowel "o" being pronounced long. ὁδὸς has become the definition of life to me.
As I begin this blog my desire is to share this journey (ὁδὸς) with you. I want to share with you what the Lord is teaching me and how I am growing into the person he desires for me to be. I'm not sure what this is going to look like yet, but it is bound to be interesting. As you read this blog you will learn more about who I am and hopefully more about how God is actively working in my life.
Will you join me on "myhodos"?
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